Omigod You Guys!: Bad Day

Today, my swim team ended. I've spent 4 years with these people. I've had sleepovers and parties. They are my best friends. I won't see half of them again. Natalie, Kristen, and I a re going to be on the same team. Monique is unsure, and Casey is gone for good. Practice was really depressing. We had about 8 people there(Me, nat, Monique, Kristen, seniors, and AG 1). We played water polo, and I was a caption for choosing teams for the first time there. And my team won. We took pictures, said our goodbyes. I'll probably see most of them again. But it wont be the same. Right now, we're like a family. Granted, one without much adult supervision and way too many teenage girls, but still. We CANNOT just let go of a part of our lives that we had. But we have no choice. Last days are always depressing. Here's what I wrote a couple days ago: " The last day is always the one you remember. Sure, there are memories of others, but you always remember the last. Every smile, every inside joke brought up, every bittersweet twinge of reminiscence. Some parts you wish you wouldn't remember. EWvery teardrop that stains you pantsleg, every hug of comfort, of goodbye. One part of your life is closed. An unixplicable silence in a part of your exsistance.

How can you live without this?"

I don't want to go to another team. I don't want to be the new girl. I don't want to spend dryland talking to the only other person from GTAC, instead of 6 girls clustered around eachother all talking at once. I don't want to not know whats going on all the time. I don't want their stupid cap design of an eagle. I don't want whatever their colours are. I want green and gold!

I want all my friends with me. I want to be able to joke with someone, and know that they won't just l0ok at me weird. I want the overnight meets where you go to a resturant and meet 3 other swim families and just talk, or maybe go shopping. I want the sleepovers that half the people fall asleep, and the others take stupid pictures of the sleeping people and tell our deepest darkest (stupidest) Secrets. I want us all together again.I want the basket bingo! I want Mackenzie to talk about hottness of guys, and Natalie for 3 hour long phone chats until midnight, and Katie to be her weird, friendly goofy self. I want Kristen to dance to M.J. and say she's a ninja gangsta. Heck, I even want Monique to talk on and on about Tom! I want Victoria's horrible lying skills, I want Tom teasing Mo nique, I want matt sharing his Ipod with me and Blasting horrible music. Except Cobrastyle. That song is way to catchy. I want Chris to play video games with and fail miserably. I want Jeff to use his 3 jokes. Over and over. I want to hear Natalie and Chris arguing in the back of the car. I want to see Tom throw Moniques stuff in the pool. I want to smell the familliar smell of chlorine. I want to taste the pounds of twizzlers that we consumed. I want to remember everything.